Wednesday, July 07, 2004

WHAT did she just say???

People, people. Please remember to set the example for your children. Who do you think they will learn things from?? Yes, YOU. Remember, the ADULT? Some people should not be allowed to have children. Ever.

"Get your ass over there and watch them. What's wrong with your head??" Just what every mother wants to hear screamed across the food court at the skating rink while I Can Only Imagine (christian song) plays in the background. Oh yeah. Mom was in her 40s, on crutches, with 4 kids ranging in age from crawler to teen. She had that look of having had a hard life and bleached blonde hair once too many times. I dunno who was who with the kids..but someone needed to crutch-slap that woman. If you want to act/talk like that in the privacy of your home, fine. But spare the rest of us your inability to parent or lack of respect for yourself. I'm sure she must talk like that all the time too. It didn't just slip out all of a sudden. She said it with such ease. Sad.

Another thing... before you have kids, or after you know you will be having one... READ UP ON THEM! No, there may not be a "manual" out there, but there are plenty of books to teach you what to expect/not expect from children of just about every age. You get a new computer and will spend hours pushing buttons and reading up on new programs. Won't you do the same for your own children?? If not, then don't have kids.

I was floored when the little girl across the street, who is all of four years old, informed me that she didn't get any time outs yesterday and NO checks! Hello?? The girl is 4. What on earth could she possibly be doing at age FOUR to get a check?? Rob a bank? And a check is not a good thing anymore.

Adults expect too much from children nowadays. Let them be kids. At age four you cannot expect a child to share. It is not that they will never learn, it's that their minds do not have that mentality yet. Would you expect your two-day-old infant to roll over or put things in her mouth? Would you expect that same baby to sit up or start walking at 4 months of age? Of course not! There are specific things that children of specific ages will do. You know how when your baby realizes that if he tosses his toy out of the crib is IS still there... just ...down there... unseen, but still there. THAT realization/understanding comes as the child learns! Granted, some children are exceptional and do things long before others. Sometimes children are s-l-o-w-e-r and will not do things until after children their age. Nothing wrong with that. Children reach milestones in their own time. Don't push too hard. Loosen up!

Reinforcing sharing is always a good thing, but you should not be punishing a child for something they cannot fully understand yet! Sharing will come in time. Cut her some slack in the meantime. You'd think those in the childcare industry would know these things. Reinforce some independent play and let the kids be kids. Prepare for a squabble. It's to be expected. That's what kids do. They are learning. Everyone is too much in a rush to make kids behave as adults. I'll refrain from expecting kids to sit still and/or behave like puppets. Too much of that going on too.

And we wonder why society is so inept these days?? Today's kids don't take responsibility for their actions. Who taught them that? They had to learn somewhere and from someone. Sometimes leading by example is much better than screaming obscene things to your kids. Unless that's how you were raised. If you were, now you know better. Don't you?

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