Tuesday, October 04, 2005

surviving and limbo

We have been so busy. It takes all day to do the simplest of things. things have come together and are holding. Not moving forward.. just holding.. limbo.

we are trying to plan out where we will live when we go back home. It's hard when the insurance agent hasn't come yet to look at your home nor FEMA. you just wait... wait and clean. clean and wait. and wait some more.

We are hoping my grandmother's house has no damage on the inside. we think we will live there while the house is being worked on. How long with that take? Who knows. there are hundreds of people who need the same. Get in line. If she has damage (water) on the inside..we don't know what we will do.

Do we just get a trailor and move it on the land and live there and doze the house? Do you buy a funky tailor and live there on the land while we rebuild? Do we rebuild? We have family that is going to need help in cleaning up yards. Not to mention iceboxes and freezers that have been sitting for almost 2 weeks turning to funk inside. Can you image the smell?? I don't even want to think about it.

We have water and gas and rich salvaged our freezer and icebox. No funk there. He's spoken to the insurance guy, but it will be 3 weeks before he can come and look at our house. three weeks??? Then we'll have to line up workers. HOW? How long will that take??? rich is doing all the clean up work he can, but he is not allowed to make repairs. Preventing further damage repair is okay. But they don't want you to make repairs until after they look at it. then get over there! He's one of few in the city...go now... get that one knocked out the way! ARGH! I know there is a lot behind the scenes I do not see... and I know it takes time.. but they need to send a bazillion workers to do this and get it done!

I've enrolled the kids in school here. they were not too happy, but I keep telling them to look at it as an adventure... many memories for down the line. They like having a routine and a "job"...they don't like the fact they have homework and having to get up. But it was good to see them smile and have stories to tell from school...and have them be TIRED at night. idles minds are not a good thing.

rich says in a few days we should have electricity. He'll secure things at home and then come up here to see us. I'm counting the days. he's my best friend.. and I miss him. I miss his comforting touch when he walks by.. his smile when he sees me.. his way of talking that makes me feel as tho everything is going to be okay and he will be there to protect us.. and keep us close. I miss his snoring at night.. and I miss his smell. Even tho sometimes it isn't too nice LOL I miss his smell. his hand on my hip when he opens the door or to guide me in the right direction. I miss hearing him joke with the kids and calling me by my pet name. I miss the kids being excited to see him.. I miss the family.

jessica said she wanted it to go back to how it was before the storm. there is no going back. It's only moving forward. Forward with a lot of work ahead.

Robin and I were talking... and askin WHY this happened. what did we "do" to deserve this?? I believe everything happens for a reason and a purpose... and I'm trying to put my finger on it.. and you cannot. There is a much higher power at work. Our lives were laid out from long ago to bring us where we are today. and even today's things are the groundwork for the future. But as we were talking, robin and I, we realized that maybe... people need to stop and help each other. Stop relying on agencies and programs and others... we have to help each other. we have to get back to being kind and respectful and helping each other. We all live in our own little bubbles... our own worlds. We are so afraid to leave our security... but we are all human..and we all should stop and help each other. Nobody is better than others... we are all we have... each other.

Jeanie - I cannot begin to tell you the excitement on my kids' faces... it was like CHRISTMAS! I hope you do not mind..but i passed your letter around the table and all the adults read it.. and we all cried. My grandmother passed it up... she said she wanted to read it in private. We are greatly touched and very much appreciate the time and effort that went into sending those boxes! the kids were just tickled..and it was a great lesson for them to see that people they have never met care... and that will stay with them for a lifetime.

lets all hope that we have started a circle of helping.. and it will continue any time we have the chance.

Now, we are off to meet my sister and her family for lunch at a local soup kitchen. we have met lots of other wonderful people there too and it's nice to see familiar faces :)

See ya later!!!!

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